Crossed Wires & Miscommunications

First I was dumbfounded.

Then I was in denial.

Next, I got pretty mad.

And then a lot madder.

To the point of exasperation and wanting really badly to cuss somebody out.

To their face.

Now, I'm just happy that I have a house to call home, some crappy weather to complain about and lots of other opportunities that are just around the corner.

Yeah, it turns out that somebody didn't get the message across that my husband is NOT at entry level.  In fact, he is only one test away from being an accredited actuary, which is a pretty damn big deal.  And anybody in the insurance industry ought to know that.  Especially after 2 really good phone conversations in which my husband made his goals and skills readily apparent to anyone who might have truly been LISTENING.

At least they could have taken the time to READ his resume.

We wonder what these people must have been smoking.

Seriously.

Sometimes I can only sigh and smile and wonder WTF.

I guess we'll chalk this up to yet another misadventure in this whole effort to get our butts to Texas.

And hey, at least we didn't have to pay for that plane ticket.....

Risk = Reward

For reasons of simple circumstance my husband and I both learned to avoid risk.  For him it was being born into abject poverty that stole his willingness to risk much of anything for a very long time.  For me, child abuse and parental mental illness left me with little desire to step very far at all outside the box that I learned to live in.

In the last 5 years or so, we have both gone through a process of steadily learning to put ourselves out there in the world, more and more.  We are each noticing an ability to thrive at higher levels without such a large self imposed safety net. 

Being able to logically asses risk while gaining the skills that only come from having genuine failures under your belt is a true balancing act.  It also builds a level of confidence that cannot be achieved while hiding out in the 'safe zone'.

Credit: Wolfgang Sauber, wikimedia commons

If you are fortunate enough to have learned just how important risk is on the earlier side of life, you probably have a wonderful strong family to thank for that.  And if you are a parent that encourages your children to take risks, even if they are not the risks you would choose to take yourself, I sincerely thank you for your contribution to society!

The idea of risk versus reward has been on my mind a lot this week. 

My risk for this week has been relatively small but the reward was bigger than I would have thought.  While preparing for obedience classes to start, I decided to take my chihuahua to a puppy socialization group.  It turns out the group is mostly great BIG puppies- puppies that gain more weight in a week than my puppy will ever weigh when he is full grown!  I have to admit that I sweated buckets and wanted to run away while my dog hid in the corner during most of the first group session.  But the second session was so much better!  I am glad that I sucked it up and took Tanner back to the group, even though I was feeling quite apprehensive.  He was much better this time, venturing away from the walls and interacting with some of the other dogs.  It was obvious that he was so proud of himself, with his head and tail held high.

My husband is taking a bigger risk this week.  He is in Dallas, TX for an interview that will happen tomorrow.  He feels really good about his chances this time.  He took his favorite shirt with thin purple stripes, rather than the safer light blue one.  He says he feels like he belongs now that he is back in Texas.  We have been through this process so many times.  It would be easy to get burnt out and give up.  And yet we won't.  Although it has been difficult to be patient, it has been fun to watch my husband gain confidence in his abilities to demonstrate his knowledge and skill and KNOW that he will find the right fit for him.  Even if this is not 'it' for us and we end up waiting longer to get to Texas, we both know it WILL happen eventually.
As for now, tomorrow is another opportunity to walk the high wire of life as it was meant to be done- without a net!

So It Turns Out Arizona Is Not Palm Springs, Texas Or Even Atlanta, For That Matter

Please, anyone in Arizona who reads this I really do not hate you or the state you live in.

I have honestly put off blogging about the whole experience of the past week in which my husband had a job interview in Arizona and we were already going to be in Palm Springs so it all worked out just great because:

1) I am actually a little ashamed at how I could possibly have miscalculated how much of a not so positive visceral reaction I could have to a place, that never actually did anything so wrong to me.

2) I do not completely understand how even though I know that where I live now is not where I want to be and going to Arizona could be a highly convenient stop along the way, I am totally not willing to do it.

3) I so wish I was one of those people who could just live anywhere and be happy about it.  Turns out- not so much.

4) I've had such a positive vibe going in my life lately that I honestly did not see this coming, as in NOT AT ALL.

5) I am more than a little bit weighted by the fact that my husband finally received a job offer RIGHT AWAY from a place that has a much lower cost of living and a whole lot more sun and we both agreed that we had to turn it down.

6) There is no respite for the wicked who won't take what is handed right to them so we totally deserved the fact that we came home to a disgusting only-in-the-northwest style grey misty 58 degree summer day.

The good news is that my husband and I totally agreed on all this.  And that we may just yet get our own little piece of what it turns out is what we now term 'desert light' down in Palm Springs.  Yes, I should have known very well that a place 4 hours away from one that I love can and will be totally different.  And yes, you can start flogging me with a wet noodle anytime now...

Surprise- A Road Trip Adventure!

My husband and I have been planning all along to go down to Palm Springs to look at condos during the week of the 4th of July.  We have saved and saved and are finally ready to at least physically look at some properties.  It has been quite educational and frustrating to find out what all this entails. 

Here in a nutshell is more than anyone who is not shopping for a Palm Springs condo could ever want to know: 

1) As I mentioned in a previous post, Palm Springs is unique in that every other mile of the city has been designated as native Indian land.  This means that half of all properties have a small lease that is paid to the native people over a long term contract that is renewable indefinitely.  Basically both the natives and the city want to keep this as a simple peaceful arrangement so as to be profitable to all parties.  However, this also makes fairly unpopular lending on condos in general even a bit more sticky in Palm Springs. 

2) So many condo properties in this area of California have been foreclosed on that many of the communities have more units being owned by investors than actual residents.  And, guess what?  The banks don't like to loan on condos that are majority owned by investors.

3) Even with perfect credit and a good sized down payment, anything that is deemed 'wrong' with the community that we might eventually select a unit in could completely nullify any agreement we might actually have with a seller.

So have I mentioned that we're up against a big challenge here?! 

No worries, we are NOT giving up that easily.

We're up for a look with a realtor and it's happening next week.  Yes, you might have noticed that is one week PRIOR to the week of the 4th of July. 

We have moved the trip up BECAUSE.... drum roll please.....

My husband has an in person interview with a company in Arizona!  ...And he can't fly yet or even pick up more than 15 lbs., which would put luggage out of the question.  BUT, he is feeling great and ready to do an interview so here we go- We'll be driving down and taking our two dogs along with us.  Yes, we're a little bit crazy!!!

And we'll top off the trip by stopping by and picking up my nephew, Nathan, on the way back so he can have one of his week-long summer visits with us over the 4th of July.

It is going to be one big whirlwind adventure!

Things Could Get Interesting...

As my husband and I have been chugging towards moving on with our big scheme, he has just finished up with the first preliminary step of taking yet another of his oh so fun and grueling actuarial exams.  Meanwhile, I've been keeping myself preoccupied with helping my neighbor redo her bedroom while her husband is away on business.  We were dorks and didn't take a before picture, but the results are a-maz-ing!

I find it's definitely better to do something to get your mind off the actuarial exam even when you're not the one taking it.  Those suckers are harsh.  They just are.  I found an article on line about how this whole actuarial exam process effects even the spouse of the actuarial student and I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry about how accurate the observations of the writer (another actuarial student) were.  A kind of super scary roller coaster interrupted by mass repetition of mathematical formulas and bad governmental regulations with a very short time constraint dropped into the mix.  FUN!

So leading up to this sitting for the exam and keeping in mind that my husband is having major surgery next week, he had told the 2 recruiters that have been helping to set us up with contacts that he would be concentrating on studying for his test and wouldn't be available for any job stuff until after the test.  That was a few months back.  Sure enough, an email came through yesterday from 1 of the recruiters with a time stamp that indicated that it was sent during the time my husband was taking his test.  The email indicates that there is an intriguing opportunity in Dallas, TX. 

After some research on the company, my husband plans to answer the email with interest in this opportunity while trying to temper that with some careful sidestepping of the fact that he will be completely out of commission for a bit here during the initial recovery from his surgery.  And yet we don't want to put these people off for too long. 

I see phone interviews from the couch in the near future...

T Minus...

These are my t minus numbers for the next day or so regarding a job interview for my husband in Texas!

(4) In just 4 hours I will be taking my husband to the airport.

(14) At 6pm central time my husband will have dinner with a few of his prospective co-workers and others.

(30) 8am central time will be the beginning of a long day of interviews for my husband.  It seems as if he will be meeting just about anybody and everybody.

(62) The number of hours before my husband will be back home and hopefully have some encouraging and maybe even exciting news to share!