Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Not Backing Down

My apologies to those who are tired of all the medical talk.  I would usually be right there in that camp with ya, believe me.  However, this is a big part of my life at the moment so I gotta' get it out there.  I will be oh so happy to be on the other side of this once we get past May 16.  That's the day that my husband's surgery will happen and then we get to work towards recovery. 

As for now, today was the day for the last pre-op visit regarding my husbands big reconstructive surgery.  This time we saw the muscle specialist.  She was NOT as happy-go-lucky, touchy-feely as our hernia doctor.  She does come with wonderful credentials and everyone says her work is impeccable.  The doctors can't all be somebody we'd like to hang out with, right?  I guess it's good to have a dose of reality to go along with my hopeful attitude.  Balance is a good thing.

So here's the low down:  Because of the original massive infection there isn't a whole lot of abdominal muscle tissue left to work with.  That means that my husband will need to have a lot reconstruction work done using some of his oblique muscles in place of most of his abs.  Realistically, we can expect to see a return of about 80% of his original core strength level.

Now usually I like to say that I am neither optimist or pessimist, but a realist.  In this instance though I am totally going with the optimism.  There is no other way to go here.  We may be faced with the idea that nothing will ever be the same and that we shouldn't expect too much, but I'm just not accepting that.  Everything we have been through so far has shown me that I should expect more than anyone would imagine. 

I am still feeling...

Photo credit:
Two and half years ago when this all started, my husband and I were living a pretty charmed life in so many ways.  We had many things to be thankful for and life was pretty predictably good.  It felt as if we had exceeded all expectations for how others thought our lives would probably turn out, considering where we both come from.  And yet, I don't think we really got it that there was so much more waiting for us.

And who could have guessed it would all happen because of my husband coming through a near death experience? 

I know people say that certain major life experiences change them for the better.  They say it all the time.  It starts to feel cliche'.  But it isn't a cliche'.  Not when you're living it.  And I am no different.  I believe that this is changing us for the better.  Even as we go through it I can see how this whole thing has made me capable of dreams I never could have dreamed before, in a pretty direct way.  I have literally gone from being thankful that my life is finally just pretty much 'normal' to believing that's it's actually OK to voice my craziest desires aloud.

One of my all time favorite inspirational pieces of art:  
Check out those road signs!

Art credit:
There is something about already having been through hell that makes me know for certain that my husband and I are going to make it back as well.  And when we do get back, we'll be stronger than ever, ready to tackle anything else that comes our way.


  1. Things like this put life in perspective and teach us what is really important. You have the right attitude and will make the best of whatever becomes of this. I do believe that prayer moves God and good thoughts draw the same to themselves. Being realistic prepares us. Being hopeful carries us through.

  2. This post clicked for me. When you go through so much crap, at the time it doesn't mean anything. It is only later that you see the lesson in there. It takes time to see that there was a point to it all. Now that you are on the right path you can see the Grand Design, so to speak, and all of the lessons make sense. So, of course, you are going to be optimistic. And however this turns out is going to be intended for you to grow toward one another. There is always a lesson in there somewhere. As long as we are here, we are signed up for a class. Maybe your class right now is just faith that you can trust yourselves to take the right road each time you hit the fork. "No longer an option" truly is no longer an option each time you chance upon it in your journey and don't go there. You pass by it enough times and you get to cross that one off and move on to the next class.

  3. There is ALWAYS a lesson to learn from our trials and tribulations. That's my belief anyway. And you have nothing to apologize for. Just keep that positivity going! It's interesting to see how after a while of doing it over and over, it becomes second nature to us.


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