Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Echoes

It echoes in my kitchen.  I have gotten rid of so much, that the place literally echoes.  I noticed it the other day.  It made me think about when we first moved into this house, almost 12 years ago.

I needed this home so much back then.  I needed something, anything that really was a home. 

We had moved here from a tiny little cinder block rental house and this house was so huge compared to what we had moved from that it echoed in every room.

The house wasn't the only thing that felt empty.  My heart was empty. 

I had just 'lost' my mother to her mental illness.  My sister had just had a baby, that I instantly fell madly in love with, and she had taken him 4 and 1/2 hours away to live with a man that she wasn't legally supposed to be seeing at all.

I so desperately needed something solid, something with a real foundation that I could build upon.  That's what this house has been for me. 

This house has been the place where my husband and I have both grown into ourselves.  We have loved our friends and family so freely here.  We have shared this home for more time than either of us have ever come close to being in any other home, in either of our lives.

Now, over the last couple of years, we have been preparing to leave in search of new and different adventures.  We are both more sure than ever that it's time to go, to seek out the sun, to find yet another facet of ourselves that we haven't met yet.

And so I have been slowly, but surely, emptying out this house.  I have known for a while now that I intend to leave without much baggage.  We will leave this place in a very similar state to what it was when we came here.  There will be echoes in the empty rooms and my heart will be open and ready for the next big thing.


12 comments:

  1. It can be bittersweet to leave a place that has known so much love, but it is easier, isn't it, when we know in our hearts that moving on is the right thing to do, at the right time in our lives.

    Best wishes as you continue on your journey!

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    1. Thanks- I'm excited about what is yet to come!

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  2. I empty out everytime we move...and I need to do it again since the Army is letting us stay 3 more years.

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    1. I think everybody should 'empty out' more often. It is so freeing to have only the stuff that you really need, use and appreciate in your life.

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  3. Open and ready for the next big thing. Endings and beginnings have something in common. You can't have one without the other. They are scary and exciting. Have you heard the song The Moon and St. Christopher by Mary Chapin Carpenter? If not, I suggest you give it a listen. It is one of my all-time favorites. No, it was never released as a single....

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    1. I went straight to youtube and listened to that song as soon as I saw this. Mary Chapin Carpenter is one of those singers that can really get you. There is a sign above my double front door that reads: Grow old along with me the best is yet to be
      I am excited and ready for a new beginning!

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  4. Great post. Change is only as good as you make it!

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    1. I'm one of the few people I know that loves change and all the good that it usually brings!

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  5. Great post.
    It sounds like you are moving forward in a good way. And it sounds as though you are very ready to begin another chapter in your life and somewhere new.
    Oh, and if you are looking to clean out more, there's always my house. We could really use a good clean out and toss. With three kiddos and being here for 12 almost 13 I am ready to move and begin new with very little.

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    1. Cleaning out other peoples stuff is actually something I really love to do. I come at it with respect and yet I push a little. It's always so fun to see how freeing it is and how much easier it can be to live with less stuff.

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  6. Sniff. Your post made me cry a little because I love and need a home in my life. I don't do change well and a house has always been my symbol of stability. My husband and I used to buy a house but then couldn't let go of the others. That is how I ended up with so many houses when he died. I loved each house for different reasons and it has been a struggle letting go. I've never been a decorator but the trees and the surrounding land were the things that mattered to me.
    You are very lucky to have the stability of your house for 12 years. I am sure it loved you as much, in return.

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    1. The stability has been great. I just don't know if I needed to be here quite this long. I was ready to go about 3 years back. Oh well, I guess I'm not that sentimental after all.
      I hope you got renters for your houses over the years. At least it wouldn't be so costly that way. But whatever works for you, I say.

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