100 Days

Image found at freedigitalphotos.net

You may have seen the article over at yahoo about the woman who committed to working out for 100 days and what happened for her over that 100 day time period.  She was certainly better off in more ways than one, by the time that 100 days had passed.

Inspirational type videos and such don't always do much for me.  I feel that in the internet world a lot of that stuff is overblown and just annoying.  What can I say?  I''m not always the touchy/feely sort.  Especially when I feel a story, pictures, etc. is being done for reasons that are other than noble (reasons that scream 'look at me', 'I need attention', 'no, seriously, look at me!').  Sometimes though, I do find myself a bit inspired by something I've seen.  Sometimes things feel genuine enough to make me wonder how this person's experience could affect me and my life.

This time around I'm thinking I'll take this woman's 100 day experience and convert it into something I can use for myself.  Something a little different than the usual New Years resolution type fare. 

Since I feel 100 days is doable for just about anything, and I'm curious as to how this type of approach could work for something I've been thinking about doing anyway, I'm going to attempt 100 days straight of a good skin care regimen.

This may sound silly.  For me, skin care has always been an issue.  My skin is not the typical commercial worthy terrible and yet it has been not a lot of fun for a very long time.  Yes, at very nearly 40 I am still dealing with occasional acne breakouts and have had this problem since way before I was a teenager.  I have tried so many things and most have been way too harsh and didn't really help.  However, by chance and by listening to a good friend who works in the skin care field, I have realized that if I can just stick with a good cleansing and light moisturizing routine I can improve my facial outlook dramatically.  And since I am turning 40 I would like to finally get this issue under control.  I'm just not so good at sticking with the routine.  As soon as I get things looking better, I kind of 'forget' to keep it up.

Isn't it funny how we forget to do things for ourselves? 

It is hard for me to do the little things that mean taking care of me.  This is one small thing that I feel could make a big difference for me and that I deserve to take the time to do for myself.

What about you?  What would you like to attempt to do for 100 days?  Would you be willing to take the time to do it?  Does 100 days seem like a long time to you?

What Would You Do?

I was out doing errands the other day and I had a very interesting experience.
There was a woman cutting fabric at a counter in the back of a store where no one else was around and she started talking to me.  She asked me if my husband was a nice man.  She then asked me if he had ever cheated on me!  Naturally, I was shocked. 
It turned out this was just a preface to her telling me all about how her husband was cheating on her and she knew it.  She also told me that he was never really ever kind to her and gave me several examples of how mean he could be.  She was so sad and looked just lost.
Eventually, she ended up asking me what I would do if I were in her situation.  Again, I was shocked.  I sensed that she needed someone to talk to about all of this and that I just happened to be there at a desperate moment.  But I didn't expect her to ask me for any sort of advice and I wasn't sure what I should say with her being in such a fragile state.
Still, I felt the need to be honest.  So I was.
I told her that if I were in her situation I would probably feel pretty sad and that I would need to take the time to make sure that I was taking good care of myself.  I also said that I wouldn't do anything rash as sometimes the best answers to a problem take time to figure out.  Then I said that in the end I was sure that for me the answer to this particular problem would involve me leaving this man, knowing that there were better men out there in the world that would love to spend time with a quality woman.
With that said I made it clear that no one can tell anyone what to do in any certain circumstance, but that there must be people close to her who could support her through this particular problem, if only she were able to open up to them.
Then I went about the rest of my day.  But, of course, I couldn't quite shake this woman from my mind.
I couldn't help but wonder if I had done the right thing.  Was she really looking for an answer?  Would it have been better to just listen?  What would you have done in this situation? 

 

photo credit: stunning mesh

 

Choosing Not To Change

There are times in life when one simply must change.  And most of the time change is difficult, but at least eventually worth it.  Some changes are obviously major and others start out small and sometimes become surprising large in the end. 

One clear example of this is when a family welcomes a child.  I can't really think of anything that brings more change.  I just got back from a maternity photo shoot for a couple who have been trying to have a baby for 7 years and finally are within 2 weeks of delivery!  They are excited and are meeting this big change with happy hearts and willing souls.  I loved being able to share and capture this thrilling time with them. 

In the latest chapter of my own life, things have gotten pretty shaken up.  And mostly, much for the better.  I have written about some of that here on this blog.  Lately though, I have had an interesting relationship with change in some ways.  In my effort to be open to all that is available to me in this life, I have tried not to pass judgement too quickly on opportunities to change even if they are a bit uncomfortable.  I have 'tried on a decision' for a while before really deciding what I would do in a situation.  This is not the norm for me.  I am typically very decisive and don't look back nor regret the decisions I make.  This has turned out to be a pretty good experience for me overall.  

Still, there are a few things that have popped up that I have noticed that I just do not wish to change.  Even if there are benefits, sometimes we as humans just don't decide to change certain things.  One of those for me is the way that I speak.  While I know in my heart of hearts that sometimes my voice is too loud or carries too far in certain social situations, I also know that I am not going to change this about myself.  Sometimes people shush me or tell me to quiet down in some way, especially older folks.  It doesn't happen often, but it has happened enough that I have taken notice.  When I do try to adjust my voice in these situations and appease certain people I end up resentful and feel as if I cannot truly express myself.  I just haven't been able to find a good balance that pleases everyone and still allows me to communicate freely.  I could use the excuse that I grew up very squelched and limited in what was allowed of me.  I could say that my voice is bubbly and exuberant and that these people must be stuffy old folks.  The truth is some people are going to be offended by the volume and manner in which I choose to communicate.  And I'm O.K. with that.  Way more O.K. than I am with trying to change something about myself that I actually like.  I like it that I don't have to be asked to speak up.  I like it that I'm not shy.  While I am not usually inappropriate to the point of obnoxious, I do like being a person, especially a woman, who doesn't generally hold back. 

That's really what it's all about isn't it?  One isn't likely to change something that doesn't hold the promise of any real benefit for themselves.  The old cost/benefit analysis...  It's funny how some things just come down to that, don't they? 

What things have you ever faced and chosen not to change, and why?