There was a woman cutting fabric at a counter in the back of a store where no one else was around and she started talking to me. She asked me if my husband was a nice man. She then asked me if he had ever cheated on me! Naturally, I was shocked.
It turned out this was just a preface to her telling me all about how her husband was cheating on her and she knew it. She also told me that he was never really ever kind to her and gave me several examples of how mean he could be. She was so sad and looked just lost.
Eventually, she ended up asking me what I would do if I were in her situation. Again, I was shocked. I sensed that she needed someone to talk to about all of this and that I just happened to be there at a desperate moment. But I didn't expect her to ask me for any sort of advice and I wasn't sure what I should say with her being in such a fragile state.
Still, I felt the need to be honest. So I was.
I told her that if I were in her situation I would probably feel pretty sad and that I would need to take the time to make sure that I was taking good care of myself. I also said that I wouldn't do anything rash as sometimes the best answers to a problem take time to figure out. Then I said that in the end I was sure that for me the answer to this particular problem would involve me leaving this man, knowing that there were better men out there in the world that would love to spend time with a quality woman.
With that said I made it clear that no one can tell anyone what to do in any certain circumstance, but that there must be people close to her who could support her through this particular problem, if only she were able to open up to them.
Then I went about the rest of my day. But, of course, I couldn't quite shake this woman from my mind.
I couldn't help but wonder if I had done the right thing. Was she really looking for an answer? Would it have been better to just listen? What would you have done in this situation?
photo credit: stunning mesh
You were sweet to sit and listen. And she asked, so it's fine to tell her what you did. It was good, sound advice. I can feel the Texan in you, even if you aren't here yet.
ReplyDeleteMany times people don't like it, but I tell them the truth. I mind my own business, but don't ask me if you don't want to hear the truth. Don't give it a second thought.
ReplyDeleteI would have told her the truth as well. But that is me...I think everyone is entitled to one free, honest opinion. She probably doesn't have anyone she can speak to. I have had this happen and when it does, I try to marshall everything I have learned in life and give it my best go..you never knew who you're helping.
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