Monday, November 5, 2012

Sometimes I Embarrass Myself

How funny that the word embarrass has the word 'ass' in it.
Cuz' right now that's about how I feel.

Yeah, it hasn't been a stellar week- I lost my sweet little dog last Sunday, and then my Nephew's family had to put his cat down last night.  We still haven't heard back from my husbands college room mate (and best friend) in New Jersey yet.  And I've been wanting to pull my hair out or reach through the phone and pull my mortgage brokers hair out over his 'tiny' mistake that cost us a week of waiting for a closing date...

I have been edgy and irritable.  And yet there really isn't any excuse for the way I've been letting myself get all worked up over stuff that isn't going to change just because I got all worked up over it.

All of this stuff is just annoying and I embarrass myself when I don't realize how much worse things can be.  

So... I'm letting everyone know that I am so sorry for being so darn selfish this week.

I think of Nathan's grandma that only wanted to go on a cruise to the Bahamas for her 10th anniversary, with her husband who travels for work so often that they rarely get to celebrate anything at all together.  The trip was to be last week and they left from a port in New York city.  Needless to say they never made it to the Bahamas and were lucky to be able to get back home on Thursday after riding out hurricane Sandy and 3 days of waiting in the airport for flights that were cancelled over and over again.

I think of my friends who just lost their church home.   Their church was suddenly disbanded due to financial issues and a pastor that resigned.  This church was really important in their lives and has been the glue that helped to stabilize them through the loss of parents at a young age, infertility issues, and a long bout of joblessness.  I just know they feel so adrift without the strength of their church.

I also think of all those people who made it through hurricane Sandy and yet have not one material thing left in this world.  No home, no tangible reminders of memories, maybe not even all of their family members.

Sometimes I can't believe what an ass I can make of myself.

While I can't promise that I won't let things get to me again, I can choose how I react to the daily annoyances of life.  It's not always easy, but I owe it to everyone to put a little more effort into the positive side and a little less jumping to donkey-like reactions.

Curious Donkey by Evgeni Dinev / Image found at

I'll start by concentrating on one of the main reasons I have been so excited about having a vacation condo:  I have an idea about being able to use our Palm Springs condo and maybe even network with others who also have vacation properties to be able to help those who never get the luxury of having any vacation at all.

Photo Credit:  Hand Fire by Salvatore Vuono
Image found at

Ah yes, so much more productive than getting all worked up and annoyed.....


  1. I wonder if you might be a little on edge because of the stress you've been experiencing yourself? I know I sometimes get that way.

    Whatever it is, it sounds like you've got a good perspective on what's going on around you to carry you forward.

    Hang in there, and have a great day!

  2. Why torture yourself? These things are all part of life. You can have feelings and compassion for people without absorbing their pain. Offer to help. Be a good friend. Listen. Speak a kind word. I see neither the jackass part, nor the selfish part. It sounds a whole lot like you might just be human. Be grateful for what you have. You were blessed for a reason.

  3. Don't worry about things you have no control over. It's wasted energy. But I get it, we're only human. Hope your week is better and brighter!

  4. I know what you're saying. I've made an ass out of myself for the same kinds of reasons more than once. It's best not to get worked up, but sometimes that's easier said than done. Glad you got things back into perspective.

    A Faraway View


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