Friday, July 8, 2011

The Good Life

Over this past 4th of July weekend a couple of unexpected and interesting things happened, as they often do when we are just rolling right along through life.

First, one of my friends had their father in law die suddenly.  This guy was 91 years old.  He had recently experienced some kind of 'episode'.  Either his heart or a small stroke- he couldn't say which and wasn't interested in finding out.  He had never been under any kind of regular medical care and had no intention of becoming one of those old people whose life revolves around doctor's appointments.  So his daughters came into town for the holiday weekend, spent 3 beautiful days with him, shared meals and laughter.  When they got back home, out-of-state, they couldn't get a hold of him to let him know their plane had landed safely.  My friend went over to check on him and found him looking like he was sleeping peacefully, but clearly gone.  He had left his door unlocked, which he never did.  It was clear that he had passed on his own terms. 

As for me, I spent the weekend with my nephew as planned, but was surprised when I came into town to find that the psychologist that Nathan would be seeing was very happy that I was there and wanted to get some in depth family history from me.  At first I was not looking forward to this at all.  My family story is not a nice one.  But I didn't want to let thinking about this ruin the weekend.  So I decided not to over think it.

When the time came to give the needed information, I did so without breaking down or wishing that things could have been different.  I just told what needed telling and was relieved to find that it wasn't that bad after all.  I think I have realized that the future is whatever we make of it, regardless of a past that cannot be changed.

It is good to know that although there will always be things that we wish we could control that we cannot, there is a lot that we can do.  And that's where the good life lives after all, isn't it?


  1. That is indeed where the good life lives. In the present and in the future. The past is what it is. Dwelling on it only brings it into our present and that is not a good thing if you don't want that sort of life in your now. That saying that life is what you make it is very true. BTW, I think this is the best ending I have read to one of your posts. It really came full circle and finished with a *bang.*

  2. Somebody once told me, "show me a family that isn't dysfunctional, and I'll show you a dysfunctional family." BTW, the 91 year old guy was right on the money.

  3. Dwelling on the past or holding on to it, only hinders us from living life in the present.


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